A North West View

One has to like it when trained counselors, psychologist, and psychiatrist like to ignore LGBTQ identiedis. Instead insisting those that do not fit the narrow box that they inhabit are dysfunctioned and even delusional. It is one thing when they do so in a professional setting like their office, even though it is still damaging there, it is atleast a setting where they have had time to get an understanding of the person over time.   It is a totally different thing when they do so in online comment threads; and provide “professional opinions” on people that have never met. that simply know through one or two comments instead, simply because they disagree with the opinion that said “professional” holds.

I had never heard the world Demisexual until about a year ago.  When I read about what it meant to be demisexual it was like a light bulb went off, and there was an explanation for the way that I am. It also meant that I was not strange; and that there were other people like me.  The most basic definition of demisexuality is that for one to be sexual attracted to another person and to actually want to have sex with them, they need to have a deep emotional bond with that person, and until they have such a bond there is just no sexual attraction.  This does not mean as in my case, and many others, that they can’t find people physically attractive; however this is different then the kind of attraction that many non demisexual people feel. That is because there is no sexual component to finding the person attractive, it is more akin to how one can find a painting pleasing to the eye, or cars and furniture.  For me I can see that someone has good looks and I can visual...

So You Tube has created a hash tag to help celebrate pride month (especially in the wake of Orlando), I thought that I would do a blog post in the spirit of the prompt as I have not had time to make a video, and I am not sure when or if I will.  However I still want to show my pride, not just as a gay man but as a person in general, as I think that all of myself sort of melds together.

It is very clear the perpetrator of the terrorist attack on Orlando, probably had multiple levels of twisted reasoning behind the attack.  Fueled by a dangerous allegiance to ISIS.  It is clear the utmost goal of the attack though is to instill fear in those that have been attack, to place fear in the hearts of the American public (and others around the world) that you are not safe anywhere. Part of the goal of this fear is to get us to turn on our fellow Americans, most specifically those in the Muslim community. Even though like every community of faith, it is made up almost entirely by people of peace who would not do a thing to harm another human, let alone take their life.  However their goal is to turn Americans against fellow Americans, to make us alienate, and segregate the Muslim community in our country. For the very reason that an alienated community is one that is much easier to radicalize then one that is an integrated part of the community, one that is tr...

Yet another tragedy at the hands of a deranged gunman has struck the country. This time, the violence broke out at a gay club in Orlando, FL, USA. Like previous shootings this year, an American citizen armed with an assault rifle opened fire on unsuspecting victims for the sole purpose of heartless slaughter, which is why he chose an assault weapon—designed for that exact purpose. I firmly believe regardless of reasons a person commits such a crime in part, is that their death grants a narcissistic wish--they want to become famous. They want their name to become a house hold name, that everyone and their grandmother says as they talk about the tragedy that they have rained down on the lives of innocent people.  As such, I refuse to use the name or picture of the person that has committed this heinous act of violence. 

So a shit storm of controversy has hit the nation, in the form of a simple kiss between Micheal Sam, and his boyfriend when Micheal was drafted to play for the Rams, making him the first openly gay NFL player, something that was not really expected to happen!  So it got a bunch of peoples undies in a bunch, with cries of what about the poor children that had to see that on TV! To those complaining that they don't care that he is gay but why did it have to be flaunted and shoved down their throats.

So today I would like to talk about something that might make some people uncomfortable  and is not something that I find the most comfortable topic in the world myself ether, and that topic quite frankly is sex, and sexuality. Yeah that topic that is only supposed to be talked about behind closed doors in whispered voices, not in a forum that is public, even if it is one that to a certain extent is anonymous at the same time. (even though nothing in life even the web is one hundred percent anonymous) However I feel that there is enough anonymity in this particular forum to talk about such a thing and how it pertains to life and especially to myself personally, in an open and honest manor. So with out further adieu I will get started right after the jump.

I know that it has been a long time since I have posted any thing, in part because I have pretty much dropped off the radar and have not even really been keeping up with any of the things that I have a passion for, sort of reading books.  Which is why I would like to try to make Sunday book reviews something of a semi regular thing, and I sincerely hope that it is something that you my readers enjoy.  On that note today I would like to review on of those books, Cost Of Repairs, By A.M. Arthur. I have been on a Romance novel kick as of late and Cost Of Repairs, is a romance, which also happens to be a gay romance.

With the nail biting election in the rear view mirror, with Obama winning the election handily once all the swing state cards feel into place, it is hard to believe that Obama's reelection is the cherry on the top of an amazing dessert.  It was a night that brought us the defeated of a proposed constructional ban of same sex marriage in Minnesota  with the public voting in favor of gay marriage in Maine, Maryland, and Washington, marking the first time in history that marriage equality has won at the ballot box.  Along with the the election of allies in congress and the senate, as well as in state government through out the country, and the first openly gay Senator Tammy Baldwin a Democratic from Wisconsin.  This is promises to be a watershed moment in history.

With only a week left until ballots mail out in Washington state, Protect Marriage Washington has started airing their first ad in what is doubtless to be a series of ads to run threw the election on Nov 6.  as the Seattle times says about this time in the election cycle  "for a ballot measure that isn't up on the air now is missing a big opportunity. Ballots mail out next week"  and it  appears  that even though they are late to the race compared to the  Approve   campaign  that has had ads running for months between Washington United for marriage and an ad run by Seattle Pride during the summer  Olympics   they seem to be  coming  out of the gate swinging using some of the same old  tactics  that have proven so  effective  in the past in scaring the public into voting their way.   although  this time they seem to have  thrown  in another tool to their  approach ...

There is something missing in the adds for marriage equality in Washington State (and in the 3 other state facing marriage equality measures this year) and that is the total lack of gay people in the ads, instead like in Washington they seem to have every one and their uncle from pro equality republican positions to clergy and family talking about why marriage equality matters, how gay people want the same things out of marriage as every one else in society and why they are deserving of the right to marry. Yet there are no gay people making the case, which even thought the ads that are being put out are good and do carry the message well and pull at the heartstrings of the views (like the video after the jump) it would seem to me, and meany others that to have gay people make the case would be a good way of going about it.  As we are the ones that this decisions ultimately affects why aren't we the ones ...

Maybe I am weak, maybe I just can't do whatever it is that is the best for me, and damn the outcome!  Maybe that is what I need to do not to live not only in an awkward limbo with myself,  but also wanting something that i very well may never get. However it also seems to be the very thing that I can't do when it comes to my dad. Even though he had a "talk" with me after I posted this youtube video about feeling shoved back in the closet,

One of the newest groups to throw their support behind marriage equality in Washington state and take an official stance that Ref 74 should be a proved is the Seattle Chamber Of Commerce which represents 2,200 company's, it joins the ranks of company's like Microsoft and Starbucks, as well as many faith groups and Labor groups like my union UFCW 21, in voicing their support for the right of all citizens of Washington to be able to marry.   Of course being the chamber of commerce their reason boils down to the economics of it, in that it creates a simpler system of providing benefits to employees who have same sex partners, as well as helping to make it easier to attract and keep talent, especially when competing with other states (and countries) that have marriage equality. In addition to gaining another voice for equality Washington...

Gay marriage or as it should be call marriage is something that is very important to me, and has been since I was little.  I have always know that I wanted to get married and to have a family of my own, the only thing that has changed is that as I finally came to terms with the fact that I was gay, a wife became a husband.  For me personally I have always wanted to find that person that I love and am meant to spend the rest of my life with.  The person that I want to build a family with, the house, kids, minivan the whole nine yards, and a big part of that is marriage.

So it never ceases to amaze my how people think that some how they can be a polite homophobe and prove that they are not hateful and there for a good kind of homophobe, and this comment from an Anonamus poster just goes to prove that like there is no such thing as a polite racist there is no such thing as a polite homophobe. This is the comment left in response to my blog post Ref 74 The Deadline Is Near . " "hate filled agenda"LOL why do gays thing that anyone who dosent agree with them are hate filled? i'm against gay "marriage" because it's bizarre and unatrual not becuase i hate gays.Just becuase i think that a dude jamming himself into another dudes lower intestine is perverted dose not mean i hte them i just think it's disgusting " (copied exactly spelling and grammatical errors included) Now this sort of comment contains one of my biggest pet peeves and it is when the person posting not only tries to paint them selve...

With all that is going on in Washington state with the marriage equality bill, and the campaign that is already is underway to overturn it, it is hard not to get sucked up into the politics and debate that is swirling around it, even more so when your gay and thus the subject of said debate; and this is where I find my self sucked into the storm.  Maybe for some getting sucked into that storm is something that has no affect on them, not even in those quite moments late at night, early in the morning or those stolen moments during the day when all you have to occupy yourself with our your thoughts,  but for me that is not true, allowing my self to be sucked in dose have an affect on me, some good some bad and some just not quite ether, however I also believe however that you can't truly live if you just stand outside the fire.

So many of you may have already heard that marriage equality in the great state of Washington, my home, is already under attack by the anti gay rights lobby, we have two legal fronts that they are trying to attack us from, one being threw the referendum process, for which not even 3 hours after marriage equality was signed into law they had submitted their referendum which is now officially Referendum 74, R 74/Ref 74 for short.  They have the 3 month period starting with the end of this legislative session, in other words until June 6th, to submit 120,557 valid signature (non duplicate, signatures voters registered to vote in the state of Washington) and of the initiative they have until July 6th to tun in  241,153 valid signatures as well.  but the Initiative has been in the works (it was filed back in January).

Only 2 yes votes are needed in the Washington state Senate for the marriage equality legislation that was introduced this week with 23 signatures to pass.  The senate is the key roadblock to the passage of the legislation as identical legislation was introduced into the State House, with 50 signatures which is enough votes to pass the legislation in the House. Things are so close yet still so far away, there is still a small pool of officially undecided/committed senators that could swing the vote into our favor, those senators are Senator Andy Hill, R-Redmond; Senator Joe Fain, R-Auburn; Senator Mary Margaret Haugen, D-Camano Island; Senator Jim Kastama, D-Puyallup; Senator Paull Shin, D-Edmonds  and Senator Brian Hatfield, D-Raymond.  Then there is Senator Doug Ericksen, R-Ferndale.  These are the people that we have to try to sway into our favor.

As has been floating around the blogosphere (more in depth here and here ) and news yet another gay teen has tragically taken their own life.  One could easily spend pages and pages condemning those who bullied and ostracized him, the teachers, principals and school that did nothing to stop it, the pollutions and social opinion makers who spew such toxic anti gay filth from their mouths on an almost daily basses, and how they have the blood of his death and deaths of many more before on their hands.  Yet no matter how true that is those that are easiest to blame and those that hold so much responsibility are also the ones that don't give a damn ether, yes they may fain dismay, shock or regret for a few moments but then before one can even blink their eyes they will be back to their despicable ways.  Yet this tragic loss also brings to light so much more nastiness, nastiness that is if not even more despicable at least as despicable as that which lead up to this...