One has to like it when trained counselors, psychologist, and psychiatrist like to ignore LGBTQ identiedis. Instead insisting those that do not fit the narrow box that they inhabit are dysfunctioned and even delusional. It is one thing when they do so in a professional setting like their office, even though it is still damaging there, it is atleast a setting where they have had time to get an understanding of the person over time. It is a totally different thing when they do so in online comment threads; and provide “professional opinions” on people that have never met. that simply know through one or two comments instead, simply because they disagree with the opinion that said “professional” holds.
In this case it was a post on an LGBTQ page about how it is wrong for ones partner, or those outside a relationship, to pressure and guilt those who have a low sexdrive or are going through a dry spell into having sex with their partner. In this case myself as a demisexual that has a very low sex drive; who also finds that emotional intimacy, and non sexual physical intimacy such as cuddling, kissing and holding hands to be far more intimate then sex. As well as that sex is the fancy decoration on an intimate romantic relationship; Instead of the main event. There were also many Asexual individuals saying pretty much the same thing just adding that sex was not needed at all.
Yet these “professionals” without knowing those they were replying to that definitively said asexuality and any other non-standard sexually driven identidades did not exist at all. On top of that they insisted that such relationships were sex was not the end all be all of intimacy in relationships where not intimate relationships, and that everything else is just surface and not intimacy at all. And that as such such people are never going to have a fulfilling relationship and instead should get counseling so that they can be better at just putting out on demand for partners in relationships instead of being comfortable in their own sexual identity. Let alone that it is ok that have different sexual desires, and that as such it is ok that have honest and open limitations on your sexual likes and desires. Then the as such you have a right in a relationship to enforce your comfort level when it comes to sex and such things. Nope that said not of those things but instead the exact opposites of them.
In this day and age it seems unacceptable that “professionals” think that it is ok to try to change someone's sexuality to fit better with what the majority sexuality is. It also seems highly inappropriate to not understand that for those who aren't asexual that there are perfectly normal variations in people's sex drive; and thus their desire for sex. As well as how they experience and feel about sex. I literally had one “professional” diagnose that I was dysfunctional because I would describe myself has having a very low to extremely low sex drive and one where even then sex is not really that important. That however other forums of intimacy mainly emotional and non sexual physical intimacy are most important; and that those are what is necessary for a healthy intimate romantic relationship much more than regular sex is. That instead of it simply being a sexual variation on the scale of sexuality, that instead one is dysfunctional, and either delusional. Who have suffered trauma or a neglectful up bringing that has brought those feelings about. Then on top of that to disagree with their “professional” opinion only proves your delusions, as well as you being attached to sudo-science. All because you have a different understanding of sexuallity their their narrowly defined one.
I find it troublesome that these “professionals” have not kept up on the latest when it comes to seuxal identies, and just the variations in sexuality and sex drive in general. Added to by the fact that they have not interest in learning about them, nor trying to understand them. Simply because they don’t fit into their narrow views of the world. I also find it troubling that they would push people to do things that are destructive to their sense of self, and to their mental health. Mainly trying to change their sexuality, added to by the fact that they think that it is ok to try to shame people into putting out for sex when they don’t want to. All because that is what other people want and feel should be done. In addition to the fact that they themselves don’t value the kinds of intimacy to the same level, as those that they are trying to harass into to adopting their view.
I also find it highly unprofessional to be dispensing unsolicited medical opinion. Especially medical opinions on people that you have not met before, and that you have not had the time to sit down with and get to understand. But instead who have made one maybe two comments on a facebook comment thread. I find this to be a disturbing way of sudo-practising medicine. Especially when you are practising it in a way that can have negative effects on those that you are trying to actively sham. As well as on those that simply read said comments, who then take them onboard for themselves. It would seem to be that the only appropriate place to give medical advice would in a medical office with someone that you have had the time to examine; not to some strangers on the internet that you have never met before. I think that it is one thing when a lay person dose it, because then it always comes with the “grain of salt” that they are not a medical professional and that it is best to actually seek the advice one one over a random stranger on the internet, and their opinion.
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