A North West View

I know it has been a while since my last post, I have been doing OK, in a bit of a rut but not bad. So once again I have really been struggling lately with taking my medications, (how ever I have been strictly adhering to them) and wanting to be off of them for a number of reasons. I have once again had somethings come across my desk so to speak that have again stocked my mistrust of medication and psychiatry at large

So I'm being faced with the fact and starting to be forced with trying to truly change the fact that in my life and my view of my self I have many many ideas and ideals about how I should be that totally conflict with the reality of what I am how I am, and what actually makes me happy.  One of the biggest ones that also seems to be particularly hard to deal with is my negative views of my self when it comes to my sexuality, the way that I can and my natural manorisms. It is something that almost totally conflicts and is something that seems to be so deeply ingrained and no matter how much when it is looked at in a logical way somehow the assumptions and unattainable ideals still seem so right and like to see things other wise is some how simply just wrong. Then add to the fact that I don't understand why I feel this way and see things in this way which should not matter when it comes to the fact that t...