So I have been a bad blogger and fallen off the face of the earth for a while, in part just because of the holidays, but also because I just don't seem to manage my time well enough to allow myself to sit down and with myself, to just be and to collect my thoughts, let alone to sit down and write. Which is something that I really want to start to work on, as I need to try and carve out time to do just that, instead of incessantly distracting myself from the time I get up until the time that I go to bed. I think that this is something that I want to try to focus on doing this year (I know that it is pretty late to be coming up with a New Years resolution, but when it comes to that thing who says you have to be on time)
So some thing exciting has happened, about two weeks ago I took delivery of my new car, a Mini Roadster. After waiting several months from the time that I ordered it till it got built and shipped, tracking it all along the way! I have to say that I am absolutely loving my new car and am so glad that I took the plunge and decided to treat my self.
Then there is the recent not so nice news, news that I am still bitter over and that I am trying to work beyond being so. So one day mom comes home from work and tells me that another coworker was looking that the job posting and my position had been posted. Now on one had even given me a heads up, and not even on the day after I found that out when I went to work did anyone say anything (even though they saw me when I was fist coming in) until I brought it up. At which point I was told well the lead position job that I had was not an official one so the newly posted one (that took away mine) would have to be applied for. The only catch is that it was a drastically different position. For one thing it had gone from a helping the customer with a purchase position to that of a hard sales position of get them to buy even if they where just in looking, It had a lot more specialty requirements and to top it of there was a sales quota that has to be met (the store is not a big furniture sales store and we don't even have a full furniture pad so we don't have hardly the selection of the sister store in town. and add to that, that it is not even a commission set up ether) And they expected me to just agree to this drastic change of the job and even more added responsibility with out question. Well I was not willing to take on a position with such requirements that all but set one up for failure.
So not only did I lose my lead position that incidentally I never did get lead pay for (something that I have no will to fight for anymore and given that it was not an officially recognized position something that I doubt I would have and success at) I have lost my 40 hour guarantee, and have been dropped back down to a part time 24 so I could get almost no hours! All of this after busting my ass in the department making sure that it stayed running as smoothly as possible and was extremely well maintained. I fell like once again I have been used and abused by this place. Every single time that I have stepped up to the plate and been a department lead (or taken on any level of responsibility) I have only gotten burned. This time not only did I lose to position that I had applied for and then been promised, along with the guaranteed hours, I did not even get the respect to be warned about it at all! And I am still expected to take care of the department, because adding another daily slap to the face is par for course.
All of this makes me resent work, and it makes it quite unpleasant to be there, even though I give it my all and do the best work that I can the reality is that I am to the point that I don't really give a fuck about the place any more. I have been a loyal and hard work and the payoff that I get is to be used and cast aside like a pile of trash.
Then one day this week the assistant store director come up to me to ask if I have applied for that position and when I said no asked if I was going to apply for the graveyard stocking position I said no, his response was "oh that means you are going to step down and just be a regular clerk" I just wanted to shout at him "there is no stepping down involved my position was taken away from me despite the great work that I have done!" but I did not. I would never take a graveyard position, as I did graveyards for 2 years and it was so bad that the person I was seeing said to quite and go on disability and that is not something that I wish to repeat. Yet I know I have to move past this, but still at the moment I am just pissed.
I guess things at work can't get much worse and at this point I really would not give a shit if they did. Anyway my car is paid for so what do I care.
Until next time I hope things are going better for you dear readers. Once again sorry for the long break and we will see if I can keep up on this on a more regular basses.