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So Hard Trying To Talk To Dad! (feed back please)

So I have been putting serious thought into moving out on my own for the last little while and especially now at trying to actually by a place of my own.  I have brought this up with Mom (and my brother already) and they both think its a good idea to pro-sue, and I want to bring it up with Dad to get his opinion, feedback and advice, however I am having a very hard time doing so.  I just can't seem to bring the subject up with him, It's like I want to but I simply can vocalize it at all, and it is very confusing and also frustrating. 

It is confusing it seems like it should not be so hard to just bring it up with him and talk to him about it as I have been able to do so with out nearly so much trouble with Mom who one would think would be the harder to do so with.  Yet it is Dad that I am having the most difficulty doing so with, and with out doing so for some reason it seems like I can't in good conscience even try to do what I would like to do. I do wish that I understood why I was having such a hard time even bringing up the vaguest of ideas about this with him.  

What do you guys think is wrong?  Do you think I am nuts for even thinking of this?  Or do you think I'm nuts for not being able to bring this up with Dad and thus possibly start to get the ball rolling further? Please any feed back would be deeply appreciated.
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Comments

  1. Biki HonkoOctober 13, 2010 at 6:04 PM

    i don't think that your crazy for wanting to move out, or wrong for wanting to move out. You are an adult now, and should be able to strike out on your own. It can be very hard at times to broach ideas with our parents, especially when we worry about hurting them, or maybe having them say something unkind.

    I think the best way to approach most dads is to use a financial angle. Talk to you dad about wanting to build for your future, and the best way to do that of course is to buy real estate. I don't know how your dad is, but most dads seem much more open to things if they are asked to help. So, open the housing section and get his input, ask him to go with to see the different condos. Make him feel valuable and you will get his older more experienced eye.

    Because for the most part, property never loses its value, so you in effect make money out of owning a place. Well, present economy not withstanding, but honestly this was a fairly rare anomaly.

    And with the prices of condos being so low at the present, you could actually buy more condo than you previously would have been able to afford.

    Being on your own, being able to decorate as you wish, inviting who you want over, have parties, dinner and otherwise is a rite of passage that everyone should get a chance at.

    So, I feel that you should gird your loins, gather your facts and start that convo.

    ReplyDelete
  2. aNorthWestViewOctober 13, 2010 at 7:49 PM

    I brought It up and was presented with an openion. Of its stupid.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Biki HonkoOctober 14, 2010 at 1:20 AM

    ok, yeah he's your dad and all, but don't let him stop you from doing what you know to be the wise thing to do. at least you gave him the chance, and the opportunity to make this an activity to help bring you two closer together. He had his chance and blew it, and down the road it will be his loss.

    ReplyDelete
  4. aNorthWestViewOctober 15, 2010 at 11:08 AM

    I know, I went ahead and did a pre aproval aplication to at least see what comes of it, becuae like mom says I have nothing to lose, and honestly i'm in a better postion then they where when the bought our house, so I'm going to give it a shot. The worse that can happpen is they say no and tell me what they would like to see so that I can make a plan to achive that.

    ReplyDelete

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